Dear Arielle, I don't know if you will see this message but I did not know anyone else to discuss this with.
It is sad to see gay people bullying other gay people for the sake of intersectionality. In an LGBT group, I was shamed and called a "bigot" several times for trying to peacefully defend a gay person's dating preferences. It started with a screenshot of a gay man's dating profile, which a group of "progressive queers" shared on social media, urging others to report his profile for "bigotry" because his bio read, "Islam is a great religion but I am not looking for Muslims". I told them that people have dating preferences and as a gay person, he has valid reasons for not wanting to date a person practicing a religion which is, honestly speaking, quite homophobic and regardless of him being a bigot or not, they cannot shame him into changing his dating pool. But I was called a bigot and even blamed for "digressing" because a few others also objected to the name-calling.
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5 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.If this progressives knew anything about religion (I am an Agnostic, but I still know and have read the Bible), they would know what is said about the "Uneven Yoke". I will leave you the passage here, so you can show them. Then, they will complain about using the Bible as a weapon.
2 Corinthians 6
14
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
15
What harmony is there between Christ and Belial [2] ? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?
16
What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people." [3]
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"Therefore come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you." [4]
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"I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty." [5]
And I just looked up, and the Quran also has something about this subject:
Sura 2:122 says:
“A man may not wed a pagan woman, unless she becomes a Believer.”
That would include women “of the book” that don’t believe in Islam.”
Therefore, that person statement in their profile is actually very respectful towards the Muslim community, letting them know he is not interested in converting to Islam, and that way that Muslim brother can continue looking for their Ideal match. Which would be another Muslim person.
PRLifter
Level 3
May 26, 2020
0
I can’t say that I’m caught up with LGBTQ issues, which is why I’m on this Fan Space, but I’ll put in my two cents.
Why are some people in the LGBTQ community now judging someone based on who they date or are in their bedroom? Isn't this is the kind of discrimination the community is fighting against?
This isn’t an interview for a job, this is someone’s personal life. The person in the dating profile sounds respectful when they say they don't want to date Muslims as well. I don't see any bigotry in dating preference.
Religion and shared moral values can be crucial in long lasting relationships.
I wouldn't have defended why they don't want to date a Muslim, but rather that it's no one else's business but theirs.
Krem
Level 2
Apr 25, 2020
1
Practically speaking, i don't know why you would want to date someone who's not into you. the luxury of dating apps is (supposedly) that you can find exactly the type of person you're interested in! if i were a muslim gay man, i'd simply not date him! i wouldn't be his type and i'd look for other men who'd be...you know...interested in me!
i have muslim, jewish, and catholic gay friends (gay and lesbian) while i'm an atheist. they've all met their fair share of 'dating discrimination' for their religion (for the guys, grindr seems a lot more "discriminatory" than what i'm familiar with) and they're somehow rational enough to know not to date them. and we're in college! i have no idea why the concept of not dating someone is so difficult...i'm a master at it lol
the kweers live in a fantasy that goes something like this: the man did go on a date with a muslim man, realizes the muslim man is super attractive and amazing, and decides to put aside his 'unjustified' prejudices and live happily ever after.
and you know what? let's say this man actually was a raging islamaphobe. let's say he hated all muslims, wanted them stripped of their rights, etc. why on earth would these 'progressives' encourage him to date muslims?? that's worse for everyone!
actually, i don't have to imagine lol i'm a lesbian. back a few months ago when i made a dating profile, i explicitly added that i'm a female homosexual looking for other females (preferably of no religion)...and so, most of my messages became "wow, go fuck yourself, terf." i don't understand!! if i'm not into you, why try to date me?!
and they keep repeating the same fantasy: what if you went on a date with a trans woman and didn't realize it, then fell in love? would you fall out of love if she revealed she was trans? um, yes? same thing if she revealed she was heavily religious or in extreme debt. "but even if you like her?" you can like someone as a person without wanting a romantic/sexual relationship with them! oh my god!
maybe i'm old fashioned...i'd rather date someone if we're both...you know...into each other. dating isn't political activism, otherwise straight men would be something of feminist champions lol. my bed's not a safe space, and to insist otherwise goes against the idea of enthusiastic consent! yes means yes and no means no.
Bilitis
Level 4
Apr 24, 2020
1
Totally agree with you, and I would also like to say that religion can be a deal breaker for people in terms of dating. A friend of mine went out with a really nice girl and they got along great - and then they found out that he was Christian and she was devoutly Jewish - which wasn't a big deal at first. They went on a few more dates, but despite the connection and attraction, their was a major disconnect in terms of their individual faiths, which was a big deal because they were both devout and they both leaned towards certain beliefs and traditions. They stayed cool with each other, but nothing else happened between them.
It can seriously be as simple as that. Different faiths can clash with each other, and that's a reality. I think that if people really had a problem with what that man's bio said, why not ask him, respectfully, to elaborate on why he doesn't date Muslims. His reasons might have to do with their faith, but not necessarily in a derogatory way. It's perfectly valid to note a preference for a partner in terms of their religious leanings, especially if you're looking for a partner who shares similar views.
@alexlgarzon exactly. i don't want to date anyone who's devoutly religious (christian, jewish, muslim, pagan, anything)--not because i hate them, but because we have different ideologies and i don't think i can be in a relationship with someone who has different core values. that's just me. i actually had a crush on someone, and when i learned she was devoutly catholic, it was an instant turn-off (along with the fact that she's in a relationship, but i didn't know that at the time). we're still friends. it's not that hard.
What is that Terf term that I have seen in some of this posts?
Jesus! maybe he didnt want to date someone of that religion because it reminds him too much of his upbringing etc like people need to CHILL
ariellescarcella
Level 7
Apr 23, 2020
4
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