guru's Profile

Follow Block User Report User

guru

New South Wales, Australia

Navigation

Posts

Sep 11, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

The barman says “Why the non-linear structure?” Quentin Tarantino walks into a bar.

My barber interrupted my horse story... ...even though I told him not to cut off my pony tale

Have you heard of that brothel by the port? I believe it's called "The Land Ho!"

What happens when you play a country song backwards? You get: - your wife back - your house back - your truck back - your dog back

Lab rats are talking… One says “Are you going to get that vaccine?” another says “Are you crazy? They haven’t even finished the human trials yet!”

So how does a nut say good bye to another nut? I'll Cashew later bro.

Unfilled US Jobs Hits 10.9 MILLION, This Is Economic Collapse In Action

Nikki Haley Explains How the Implications of Biden's Afghan Disaster Are Even Worse Than We Thought

How Depraved Liberal Culture Led Us to Lose the War on Terror

Blue/Red Pill Presented By Media IGNORES Nuanced Views, Bad Journalism Is EASY And Profitable

I’m on this great new drug to control my Tourette Syndrome. I swear by it.

My weed dealer told me he’s only accepting fruit as payment now. It’s a real pear-a-dime shift.

A while ago a stranger asked me if he could urinate on my wrist. I told him: "Not on my watch"

In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed in him To be fair though, the people who were being photographed did try to warn him

If you walk up to a house and see a sign saying “free corpses,” that’s a dead giveaway

What do you call a teetotaling maid? A dry cleaner

So I knew a man whose work focused specifically on designing draw bridges... of course, this was before his suspension.

When I was baptised, the priest wore a fake nose, moustache and pair of glasses. It was a blessing in disguise.

What supplement is good for wrinkles? Iron.

Press Sec. Stuns Reporters When She Can't Justify Vaccine Mandate | Direct Message | Rubin Report

Insane Misleading Photo Used to Smear Larry Elder as Media Gets Desperate | DM CLIPS | Rubin Report

My 4-year- nephew has been learning Spanish since lockdown. He still can't say the word for "please" though, which I think is poor for four

What's the opposite of a waterfall? A firefly.

So what is the name of the captain of a boat made of cork? Bob.

A man opens the bonnet of his VW Beetle. His jaw drops - "Oh my god, someone stole my engine!" Then he goes round the back and opens the trunk. "Phew, thankfully I have a spare."

Johnny yells upstairs: "Dad, there's a salesman here with a moustache." "Tell him I've got one."

What do you call the art of folding cookies? Oreo-gami

A new strain of head lice has been discovered which is resistant to conventional treatments. That has left scientists scratching their heads.

I asked my wife, “I’m stuck on a crossword clue—Overworked Postman— can you help me?” She said, “Sure. How many letters?” I said, “I’m guessing—too many.”

A asked her to lose their cat somewhere in the jungle. The boy obeyed. The boy returned home and reported to his mom. : Mom! I led the cat far into the jungle. I even got lost!! : How were you able to come back home? : I followed the cat.

Biden Issues Threat To Republicans Opposing Illegal Vaccine Mandate, RNC And GOP To File Lawsuits

Major Bank REFUSES SERVICE to Michael Flynn Over His Political Beliefs

Pro-Abortion Celebrity Proposes MANDATORY VASECTOMIES Amid Texas Abortion Law

Verified Social Media Influencers Work AGAINST American System Of Governance, They Just Want POWER

LEGACY OF 9/ Dinesh D’Souza Podcast Ep 2

USPS Employees EXEMPT From Biden's Authoritarian Vaccine Overreach, He Knows Workers Will QUIT

Biden VOWS To 'Get Governors Out Of The Way' Who Object To His Vaccine Mandates

Katie Hopkins - a chat with Congressman Gosar

0 comments

Comedy, Laughs and Humor.

Sep 10, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

Welcome to Comedy, Laughs and Humor.@johnlozy

Conservative Outlets, 21 GOP States REFUSE Biden's Illegal Vaccine Mandate, Leftists DEFEND Fascism

The Afghan Crisis Rings the Death Knell for Our American Privilege

Who is Doing the Taliban's Bidding in America?

Joe Biden Drops IRON FIST With Authoritarian New Vaccine Requirements For American Workers

Liz Wheeler Fans Page.

Sep 10, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

Biden's Vicious, Divisive, Unscientific Speech | Ep. 47

Never argue with a fictional character Their minds are completely made up

So I just cannot get into reading chinese fiction There are just too many characters...

In the middle of the night, my neighbor stole the entire protective barrier that surrounds my property. He asked if I was mad... Needless to say, a fence was taken.

I just got back from my first session at the Bird Psychologist He comes highly recommended, but the tweetment won't be cheep.

My wife said, “Can you have a talk with the kids on drugs?” I said, “Fine, but I don’t make any sense when I’m high.”

If James T. Kirk ran a drug business from his ship... Would it be a criminal Enterprise?

Jimmy Kimmel Thinks Unvaccinated People SHOULD DIE, Says They Don't Deserve Hospital Beds

What is house arrest for grown-ups? "Your package will be delivered tomorrow between 9AM and 5PM."

My friend told me I have no sense of direction I said “Where did that come from?”

A doctor and a lawyer loved the same Everyday the doctor brought her roses, while the lawyer got her an apple, without fail. One day, the decides to ask the lawyer why the apples, to which the lawyer replies, “an apple a day keeps the doctor ...

What does a shark call a jet-skier? Fast food.

What do you call a piece of farm equipment that's always criticizing you? Detractor.

I scared the mailman today by coming to the door naked. I don't know what terrified him more, the fact that I was naked or that I knew where he lived.

When a snake walks into a bar The bartender said “How did you do that?”

James O'Keefe EXPOSES ANTIFA Teacher For Indoctrinating Children

Howard Stern Goes Full Corporate Shill Saying "F Their Freedom," Demands Mandatory Vaccination

Health Officer Says We Are In "New World Order" Sparking Viral Trend And Bizarre Fact Checking

Biden Is CLEARLY Corrupt And Rotten Mainstream Media INTENTIONALLY Looks The Other Way

Katie Hopkins Ignore thr Larry Elder distraction. Vote YES to recall newsom

Welcome to Liz Wheeler Fans Page.@toronto_Georgia

Larry Elder Attacked By Leftist Wearing Gorilla Mask In BROAD DAYLIGHT

Rachel Maddow Tweets False Story That's PROVEN Wrong, LEAVES Her Tweet Up

Why the Texas Abortion Law is the Opposite of Tyrannical

1 comment

Liz Wheeler Fans Page.

Sep 9, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

Leftists Lose Their Mind Over Abortion | Ep. 46

Our drummer named his twin daughters Anna 1 , Anna 2

I found an erectile dysfunction group online, it looks fun. It can’t be hard to join.

One day I’m going to open a furniture store named Sofa King. That way I can make late night tv commercials and shout “our prices are Sofa King low!”

Stalin is giving a speech, and someone sneezes. Stalin looks up from his notes and says, "Who sneezed?" No-one says anything. Stalin has the first row taken away by KGB to be shot. "Who sneezed?" he asks again. No-one says anything. He has the ...

So I can’t take my to the park as all the ducks keep trying to bite him... My fault for getting one that’s pure bread.

My friend likes to cause a scene by going up to his loft and playing the bongos very loudly. It’s a drum attic.

COVID Unemployment ENDS For 7.5M People Igniting Fear Of Economic Meltdown, The Great Reset Is HERE

CANDACE OWENS: I Was DENIED A COVID-19 TEST Because of My Politics

AXIS OF EVIL Dinesh D’Souza Podcast Ep 0

Damn Nature You Scary | Funny Scary Animal Encounters

Biden Directs Tax Dollars Through United Nations to Push Open Borders

I used to sell security alarms door to door, and i was really good at it. If no one was home, i would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.

I can successfully predict the winners of every divorce case. Here is the list: The lawyers.

What do you call the anxiety you feel when you’re in a maze of buildings? A complex complex complex

When a janitor at my work asked me to come over and smoke weed with her!! I told her No. I can't stand high maintenance women.

My Doctor has advised me to stop drinking - its going to be a massive change for me. I've been with that doctor for 15 years...

My wife is fed up with my constant stream jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?!" She shot back, "Whatever means necessary!!" I chuckled, "No it doesn't!"

Landed my dream job at a guillotine factory Will beheading there tomorrow.

0 comments

Comedy, Laughs and Humor.

Sep 8, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

So my wife woke up just now. She is dreaming and muttering about how she wrote the Lord of The Rings trilogy. She’s Tolkien in her sleep.

Joe Biden looks at climate change 'totally backward'

Demanding AGL explains pathway to net-zero emissions is 'insanity'

Trump Fans Heckle & Shout at Biden While He Tours Jersey Flood Damage

Joe Biden 'on the record as very pro-choice'

The Intercept Gets 900 PAGES Of Covid Research PROVING Fauci LIED, Rand Paul Was RIGHT

‘Any man’ can enter NSW Woman of the Year award

Dog Attacks Owner Playfully While She Tries to Film Her Dance

The Outraged Pro-Abortionists are Calling for a Sex Strike...How Will This Turn Out?

Is There ANY Hope For This Generation?

0 comments

Liz Wheeler Fans Page.

Sep 8, 2021Sep 2021

Posted by guru

We Were Right About Fauci’s Lies | Ep. 45

1 comment

Photos

Top tags#video #biden #joebiden #democrats #youtube #media #Podcast #Police #Australia #world #China #ElonMusk #kids #truth #democrat #insane #government #comedy #climate #wife

Level9 (631,327pts)
Posts21549
Comments
Replies 4,311
1,960
Followers 57
Fans 0
Following 63
Referrals58
Joined Sep 28th, 2020
Last Visit 6+ months ago

guru's Groups

Comedy, Laughs and Humor.

327 members, Host

Liz Wheeler Fans Page.

116 members, Host

Sky News Australia Fans

70 members, Host

Matt Walsh Group (The Sweet Baby Gang)

59 members, Host

Russell Brand Fan Page

Anthony Brian Logan Fans

21 members, Host

International News

396 members, Moderator

I Love Dogs

89 members, Moderator

Controversial Charts

48192 members

Jordan Peterson Group

Sydney Watson Fanspace

Laughing at the Hateful Left

2675 members

Politically Incorrect folks

2479 members

Anti-Socialism

2268 members

President Donald J. Trump... Latest

2065 members

Saving Western Civilisation

2056 members

Firearms

1700 members

John Paul Watson Group

1610 members

Liberalism Is A Mental Disorder

Conspiracy Truth : Wolves And Sheeple

Emergency Preparedness and Survival

949 members

Andy Ngo Fans

916 members

Libertarian Freethinkers

898 members

COVID-19

765 members

The Second Amendment Sanctuary

650 members

Conspiracy Research

575 members

Prager University Alumni

US Elections fraud, the Deep State & The Reset

376 members

Jokes That Will Get You Banned From Twitter

Candace Owens Fan Club

The Greatest Music Ever Made, Ever Played.

205 members

Dr. Steve Turley Group

185 members

Gardening 101

180 members

Joe Biden Is Not My President

178 members

Dr. Prepper

175 members

Cyber Security/Technology/Cryptocurrencies & Blockchain

The Oldies, but Goodies

96 members

Jesse Lee Peterson fans

87 members

Mark Dice Fan Club

76 members

Literature of our time: Film and Television

65 members

I Did Not Know That...

60 members

Guitars and Guitarists - All Genres of Music Welcome

52 members

Weapons World

50 members

The Greg Gutfeld Show

HOPE, HUMANITY, ACHIEVEMENT and ENDURANCE

21 members

Monty Python and Fawlty Towers Fans

21 members

New Australian Bulletin

20 members

Association of Mature American Citizens

18 members

Cigars and Hooch: Opinions, Laws, and Culture

17 members

Education

17 members

Children's Health Defense

About
Terms
Privacy
Promote
Contact
FAQ

Slug.com - the non-profit community that permits fact-based discussions of all topics.

Navigation

Posts

Photos

Details

guru's Groups